Troubled waters…..

Finally tonight my thoughts turn to Linda…..

I haven’t seen her in a couple of days now. I hope tomorrow is a good day and I will see her…..

When we are apart I send her music videos. I hope they bring a smile, a memory, a something….They help remind me I am still alive. I sent a lot tonight. “Bridge…..” was the final one. I think she is asleep now. I hope they brighten tomorrow.

The last week of the month is always the hardest for us, We run out of things and just count down the days. Gotta find a way to feed the cats, and get some gas and maybe some food for us. October can’t come too soon.

I may have found a place to move. Got a call and there is nothing definite but it might happen. Will still be about 8 miles away but it beats 25.

These are troubled waters times. Those who follow Linda on Facebook have probably already read the news. She has been having a lot of headaches and she went to an ENT expecting to hear about sinuses. It sounds like she is going deaf. She has lost 50% hearing in both ears. They think it is progressive and although hearing aids will buy some time they will change nothing. There are more tests and talk of an operation that might help but……

What do you do when the music is turned off????

She broke her glasses in a seizure months ago and we just haven’t been able to replace them either. Seeing is a problem. I really think that is a big part of her headaches.

Desperation is real. She feels like a door is closing that never be opened again. I am real scared…Seizures serve a constant measure of the stress in our lives. Her neurologist says medication probably won’t make anything better. There is just too much stress.

On top of it all they think she may have had a small stroke in the last couple of months. Processing is harder. Really everything is.

I know it is not the politically correct thing to say but I honestly doubt Tennessee is going to expand insurance and I don’t see how we will live together again. It is a heavily Republican state and the utter meanness and insanity of what has come to mean literally breaks my heart.

My wife (and she gets mad when I say it) is as close to a hero as I have. She is brave and kind and generous and possessing of a gentle spirit. She is hurt right now…hurt very badly.

I ask a favor. Reach out to her. She is easiest to get on Facebook but let me know if you can’t and I will help. Hi matters.

I don’t know if we will ever get past troubled waters. I hope the bridge holds.

Bless each of you.

Advertisements

2 thoughts on “Troubled waters…..”

  1. This is very moving. I saw something on Facebook encouraging me to become friends with her and I will do that. Keep the faith, Larry!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s